Nightmares of Dating in the 21st Century

By Brittney Hemmands
Blog Content Contributor

It is human nature to crave affection and attention from others. We thrive off of connections; they are vital components of our lives. This is why relationships are such a big part of our society and even though it is hard to admit, companionship is something we all want eventually. Unfortunately, the dating scene has not really gotten any better. If anything, it has gotten worse. I have always heard that dating in your twenties was supposed to be “fun” and the beginning of finding your soulmate, but it has become more of a reoccurring nightmare than a dream. Here is why.

Normalized Cheating

On social media platforms, jokes about cheating on your significant other and having “side pieces” are widely used. Although commitment has not become rare, it definitely does not hold the same importance as it once did. For instance, one person committing to another used to be a known fact when getting in a relationship. Now, it has become something you have to ask for on dating sites. Nothing is worse than thinking someone is giving all their attention to you just to find out they are giving that same attention to someone else.

Lack of Empathy

We have the innate ability to feel and share emotions, but we have begun valuing keeping them to ourselves or not caring. This has happened as a result of hurt and not wanting to make us seem vulnerable in front of people. Unfortunately, what people do not realize is that not sharing our emotions and trying to not care keeps us from understanding other people’s emotions, which is a big part of connecting with others. Maybe lack of empathy keeps us safe, but it has also made the romance world more difficult than it already was.

Fear of Communication

Communication is a big part of our interactions with other human beings, but it has become our enemy when it comes to expressing our emotions to someone. Sometimes pride keeps us from communicating with someone because we do not want to be the first to text back. Other times it may be fear of denial or even fear of saying something stupid. Instead of just asking someone how they feel, we work ourselves up and overthink the situation. Ultimately, we end up letting it go, not even taking the time to figure out what could have been.

Sexualized Relationships

Although sexual chemistry is important for any relationship, it should not be the only thing that is important. This is the issue because as a society, we make a lot of connections with sex and forget how to connect with out it. The driving force for relationships has become just have someone to make a physical connection with, but we are forgetting that mental and spiritual connections can be just as important.  

There is no perfect dating world, but let us at least try to make a better one that involves emotional depth and serious connections. If there any other difficulties you have experienced, feel free to leave them below.

Featured image by Renee Dominguez.