By Tiger Shi
Web Content Contributor
Last week marked one year since I tried asking a girl out. It all started when I went to one of many regular family dinner style gatherings called family time. They were hosted by Texas State Cru three times a week. I always went to a Mondays one last year and I got to know great people. I am not afraid to admit that I’ve fallen for one of the girls there. To protect her identity, I won’t say her name so let’s call her Eva. From a hibachi dinner “date” at Kobe Steakhouse to my feeble attempts at flirting, I would like to advise others based on my experience that all escalated quickly in one weekend.
I did have past relationships before. My last relationship started coincidentally in April. It’s just been a long time since I interacted with the ladies romantically. It immediately clicked in my head when I saw Eva’s personality. She stole my heart in the sweetest way imaginable especially her contribution of recipes for the family dinners. What went wrong was my execution of my plan to win her over.
The way my last relationship started happened completely by chance. In Eva’s case, it was I who made the first move. It happened when I asked her for a coffee outing; however, she gave caffeine up for lent at the time. The conversation evolved to getting food and I picked Japanese cuisine for the two of us.
Funny enough, I gave her flowers that were made entirely by the traditional Chinese art of paper cutting which is not any different from the Japanese style. The “date” went alright but I would say it was more of a hangout and her tone when talking to me showed it. I think I did become a little carried away by paying the entire bill before we left the restaurant even though she offered to split it.
It was a Saturday when I took her to the hibachi place. That following Monday when the family time met again, we played a game where we discussed the highlight of our week, the sourest moment and what to expect in the future. When Eva’s turn came around, she said she have a date set up the following weekend. The moment it was my turn, for some reason, I surrendered to Eva’s suitor (not directly). I had straight-up confessed it to everyone in the room my feelings for her.
The moral of the story, y’all, is that don’t let jealousy get you too soon. Now looking back, I think I acted a bit pushy and needy. That is a red flag there, gentlemen. Luckily, Eva understood me well as she later told me that it was brave of me to suck it up and accept defeat. I could also tell by the sound of her voice that she didn’t expect my candidacy to be her boyfriend to end that quickly.
We continued to be friends involved with Texas State Cru for the remainder of that semester. The last time I spoke with her in-person was at a fall camp getaway last semester and then we kind of ceased contact since then. I still kept Tinder and Bumble saved on my phone, which I downloaded after that amusing “hibachi incident.” My friend Stephen gave me good words of wisdom in regards to finding someone and I’m grateful for that.
Gentlemen, it is best to just wait it out. Dating someone in general requires patience. It is like a really long job interview, minus the cover letter and resume. Do continue to make the first move (as a generous chivalry) and be sure to not act desperate. That wouldn’t be a way to go. Ladies, I believed I have redeemed myself from my failures to recruit a companion. The question is, are you ready?
Featured image via Canva.