Fault Versus Responsibility

By Chelyse Prevost
Blog Content Contributor

“We want it to be their responsibility to fix it but that’s not how it works, especially when it’s your heart. Your heart, your life, your happiness is your responsibility and your responsibility alone. As long as we’re pointing a finger and stuck in who’s fault something is, we’re jammed and trapped into victim mode. When you’re in victim mode, you are stuck in suffering. The road to power is in taking responsibility.” – Will Smith

Since Will Smith created his Instagram at the end of 2017, he’s been dropping gems left and right.  Among the amazing stories and experiences he posts, he shared a lesson on fault versus responsibility. Though the post was eventually deleted, the message caused a ripple effect on his followers and viewers, leaving the world with a few things to look back on while addressing obstacles in life. While you go to school, work, or somehow follow through with your dreams, life will find ways to throw you off track of your responsibilities. The ways in which we view our setbacks through separating fault and responsibility is only how we mean to recover from our losses. In order to be better for them, we have to actually address them.

Actually Deal

Don’t do what’s easy, do what’s right. In order to heal from your losses, you have to actually deal with them. As young adults with a lot on our plates, we’re much more likely to push our feelings under the rug in order to stay focused on tasks at hand. Instead of avoiding your anger or disappointment about a situation, be honest and accepting towards the ways that your situation makes you feel. People think that talking about their misfortunes won’t change anything, but pretending that you’re unbothered is much more problematic. We’re human, allow yourself to have emotions and take your time in doing so. More than that, make sure you’re taking the measures to actively recover and reach out to resources if they’re available to you.

Be Aware, Stay Aware

Life’s curveballs may not have had anything to do with you, but it’s your responsibility to be aware of the ways it affects you. The losses you experience in life may just be situational, but it can change your work ethic, relationships, and even your health. Balance is key; make sure that while you’re working at whatever you do that you don’t catch yourself slipping or overworking yourself. The friends and family that you confide in should always be there for you, but don’t make those relationships dependent on the weight of your problems. At the same time, do you’re best to not fall off the grid or shut these people out while healing. Even if you need space, relationships aren’t one-sided so neither should communication. Whether your problems are taking a toll on your emotional, mental, or physical health stay aware of the changes you see in yourself. Your health is your utmost priority and knowing yourself better than anyone else, it’s your job to stay on your P’s and Q’s.

Teach Yourself to Learn

From the minute we’re born until we die, life is a learning process. Processing your problems won’t always be the easiest task, but you learn along the way each time. By dealing with your feelings and staying aware of the ways setbacks will affect you, you assess your situation hands-on and turn your losses into lessons. Until you can process what happened to you and make your perspective objective rather than subjective, you allow for future mistakes in the same areas. The setback may not have been in your power, but what you can do differently to better your situation if it happens again is. When you come to the understanding of why life’s faults are still your responsibility, you teach yourself not to let misfortunes define you. Humble yourself enough to be better, stronger, and wiser through everything that comes to you along your path.

Featured image by Chelyse Prevost.